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How do I shot trip?!H508X.HbJ6 2010/02/24(Wed)12:11 No. 3382 ID: 6faa8c

I'm a cleric in the group. I basically pull the party around, I'm the one who does the talking (oddly with a charisma penalty, the DM says it's represented by the fact that I'm a huge, overbearing half-orc) and generally Get Shit Done. Now, the City Council knows that one of the Noble Families is seeking to assassinate the Child King and his Sister. So we hatch a plan: Have one of US get hired, fail on purpose, and expose the villain.

At this point, the Dwarf Fighter steps up. With an 8 in both wis and int. We decide to humor him, and we plan the eventual excraction of his unconcious body from whatever shit he may land himself in like the last two players did.

He buys small bags, flour, cinnamon, and thunderstones. Then four shovels. Then he buys three blank spellbooks.

In these spellbooks, he writes the names of three of the leading men of the Noble Houses, painstakingly forging their signatures. (Natural 20 on forgery check) This completed, he garbs himself in peasent clothing, waits for a party at the suspect's house, then goes next door. Upon bluffing his way into their basement with his +1 CHA, he tunnels from one basement to the other, and successfully sneaks all the way into the bedroom of the nobleman, bombing two of the gaurds with cinnamon and flour, as well as deafening them.

When the nobleman goes to bed, the Dwarf leaps out of his wardrobe, introduces himself, and gets the job, negotiating almost all the pay up front. 2000 gold now, 3000 after the deed.

He then goes to our wizard, who disguises two dead bodies to look like the king and his sister.

Then the Dwarf does "What any stupid Dwarf would do" and hands them over... in front of the Council.

We still don't know what the fuck he's planning for the books.

And yes, he got paid.



Any other stories of "JUST AS FUCKING PLANNED"?