Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)04:03 No. 96977 ID: eb2f94
File 12615698186.gif - (7.93KB , 640x480 , 2.gif )

I live in this cave with my boss. All he thinks about is killing people.
Sometimes I wish he could not think about work so much.

Go in the cave, I guess?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)11:05 No. 97029 ID: eb2f94
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>Go in the cave, I guess?

Inside the cave is my boss working hard. He looks very worried.

'Is that you Grey?'
'Yes it's me brother.'
'Be quiet. I have a lot of work to do'

I want to help him learn to have fun. He focuses so much on his work. He can be mean to me because of it.

>>97029
Got any idea what could cheer him up?
Some dead people might do the trick, not sure if you're up to that.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)11:22 No. 97039 ID: eb2f94
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He is always angry and yelling. Now he's more sad. I dont know what will cheer him up.

I will go to the cities down the mountain. There I can kill some people for him.

>>97039
If you're comfortable with it.
I'm just suggesting.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)11:51 No. 97053 ID: eb2f94
File 126159791140.gif - (13.04KB , 640x480 , 5.gif )

Yes I am. I kill people for money. It's my job
Sometimes I also kill people for fun sometimes.
If this will make boss appreciate having fun more then I will do it.

Who will I kill?

>>97053
two window house behind you. Go in there and slaughter them all.

>>97053
What are you anyways?
No idea how powerful you are compared to your possible victims.

>>97053
I'm not sure this is a great idea. More dead people may make him think more about work. How about you just check out what people are doing in town?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)13:15 No. 97097 ID: eb2f94
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I am very strong. I can take on a few townwatch with no problem. Not the entire army though.

I did not think that dead people cause him grief. Maybe thats why he's so down?

Everyone in the town is just doing their normal routine.

>>97097
Do you have any money? You could buy him something.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)14:55 No. 97135 ID: eb2f94
File 126160894164.gif - (16.98KB , 640x480 , 7.gif )

I have a little bit of money. What should I buy him?

>>97135
Iunno, what sorts of things does he like?
Ye gotta give us some hobbies or interests to work with if you want us to come up with a good gift...

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)15:14 No. 97140 ID: eb2f94
File 126161005779.gif - (15.25KB , 640x480 , 8.gif )

He likes order. He spends his days making sure things are perfect.
But he's also a hot-head so he's not very succesful.
He always plans missions for me. There used to be a lot of us. Now it's just me and him. I think thats why he's not sending me on a mission.
He likes to act like he is a general in a big war.

>>97140
I think he might enjoy a set of wooden soldiers.

Oh, or a board game of some sort. Military-themed.

>>97140
Buy him the best chess set you can find.
I think he might like that.

>>97140
How about some sort of book that will allow him to write down his plans?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)15:37 No. 97152 ID: eb2f94
File 126161143085.gif - (10.34KB , 640x480 , 9.gif )

That sounds good. We can play together with the chess set.
I go into the general store. I know the lady there also sells toys.

When I go in the bell at the door rings. The old lady greets me.

'Hello, welcome to my shop. What can I do for you?'
'I would like to buy the best chess set that you have.'
'I'm sorry, we don't have any chess sets anymore. It will take two weeks to make a new one.'

>>97152
Is that not a chess set behind her?

>>97155
That's a chessboard, not a chess set. She may still have to make the pieces.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)15:43 No. 97158 ID: eb2f94
File 126161181915.gif - (10.54KB , 640x480 , 10.gif )

Hey, that IS a chessboard. I will ask her about it.

'Isnt that a chessboard? Do you still need to make the pieces?'
'This chess set is already sold. If you want one you have to pay now and come back in two weeks.'

>>97152
Inquire as to where else one might find a quality chess set.

>>97158
It might be faster to just find a bigger town and buy one there.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)15:51 No. 97162 ID: eb2f94
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I dont think my boss will like it if I travel away far from home. Maybe I can ask him for permission?
Let's see if there is another place here in town.

'Where else can I get a good quality chess set?'
'You can try to the carpenter but the quality wont be very good. Or you can find people who want to sell theirs.'

>>97162
Find the richest guy in town and see if they have a chess set for sale. You could get a really good one that way, even if he wants you to do a job for him in exchange.

Thank you all for not just spazzing out with random 'lolraep' and 'lolkill' and 'lolhugz' comments. I mean, given that this guy is apparently a professional assassin, I'm pleasantly surprised that nobody wants to randomly channel Beardbeard or something.

Let's go see the carpenter. Maybe we can help. And gifts made by the giver are so much more win.

>>97162
Don't Kill him.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)16:06 No. 97167 ID: eb2f94
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Are you saying that I should ask the carpenter to help me make the chess set myself?
That sounds like a lot of fun.
I will head over there right now.

>>97167
Sounds good to me.

>>97167
Oh yes!
I approve of this idea wholeheartedly.
That does sound fun!

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)16:17 No. 97173 ID: eb2f94
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I enter the carpenter's workshop. He is sitting on a chair carving something.
He greets me.

'Hello, sonny. What you need?'
'I want to make a chess set for my friend.'
'Alright, so do you just want wood?'
'I would like it if you can help me.'
'Okay. For materials and my time I will ask 20 goldpieces.'

That's like two cows I think.

I'm assuming you don't have this much?

Well. Hmm. Are there any jobs around the village?

>>97173
How much money do you have?
And is time a factor with this project?
Or can we just take as long as we need?

>>97173
Does he want to be paid now or later?

>>97173
Haggle.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)16:35 No. 97179 ID: eb2f94
File 126161492154.gif - (10.55KB , 640x480 , 14.gif )

I have enough money. I thought that maybe two cows would be too expensive, but if you dont think so Ill accept his offer.
We dont really have a time limit. I shouldnt make the boss worry though.

'Okay. Do you want to paid right away?'
'Pay me when you want to begin.'
'Okay, let's begin now.'
'You got it.'

He points to the empty chair next to him. I sit down in it. He hands me a piece of wood and a tool.

'The board is the easiest. Let's make the pieces first. Here, you just go like this.. and this.. then you pull it around here..'

He slowly explains to me how to carve the pieces. I think I can do this.
What kind of pieces should I make?

>>97179
The red queen, the white knight, and the white pawn...

Really now? You don't know the pieces of a chess set?

>>97180
No no, he wants to know what style or theme...

>>97179
Hm...
Perhaps you could model the pieces after your boss and comrades.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)16:46 No. 97186 ID: eb2f94
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I know the pieces to a chess set. I just want to make it special looking.

I can make them look like my comrades. That is a good idea. But what about the pawns?

Look, I made my boss and myself as the king and queen. Dont they look good together?

He means the style. Really, no idea.

You could make one side be the friends of both you and Yellow, and the other side your enemies. No need to be their exact faces and stuff, but general shape and form would suffice.

And yea, 20 gold is fair I think. The carpenter is, literally, teaching you his trade. With what you learn, you can work other things in wood.

>>97186
The pawns... Make them kobolds. They're easily hired and expendable.

>>97186
Excellent. :3
The pawns... hm...
I don't kn-

>>97189
Ah! Yes. This is perfect.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/23(Wed)17:01 No. 97194 ID: eb2f94
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Okay. Im carving out all of the pieces.
The carpenter is making the board.
When he's done with that he comes to help me carve all the kobolds.

He asks
'Will this be a present for the candlefeast?'

The candlefeast is a party this town has every year to scare away the cold and the darkness. The boss never celebrates it because he doesn't believe in ice imps.

Pause GiftQuest 2009/12/23(Wed)17:06 No. 97197 ID: eb2f94
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[This will continue very soon. Merry christmas, everyone.]

>>97194
"...Yeah, I suppose it will be." :3

>>97194
"Not exactly."

GiftQuest 2009/12/24(Thu)03:14 No. 97441 ID: 992732
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'Not exactly, but maybe it will be?'
I answer.
The carpenter smiles.
'In any case, someone will be very happy with this.'

We finish the pieces at a calm pace.

GiftQuest 2009/12/24(Thu)03:18 No. 97443 ID: 992732
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After a few hours all the pieces have been carved. The carpenter smooths out a few splinters.

The chess set is done!

>>97443
Do we have any way of carrying all of it?

The perfect gift :D
He's gonna be sooooo proud! So I hope.

GiftQuest 2009/12/24(Thu)03:26 No. 97454 ID: 992732
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I thought I'd just carry it like this. Should I get it wrapped somewhere?

I give the carpenter the twenty gold.
'Happy candlefeast, sonny.'
'You too.'

>>97454
Hmm. You should get a box. You might drop some of it on the way up the mountain.

GiftQuest 2009/12/24(Thu)03:32 No. 97466 ID: 992732
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Okay. I buy a nice box from the carpenter for another 2 gold.
So shall I just go home?

>>97466
Hmm, you may as well get it wrapped too.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)06:42 No. 97565 ID: 0a76c8
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I get the box wrapped for a silverpiece at the general store.
Im heading home now.
I wonder what my boss will think?
I hope he'll be happy.

Well, we have to try, don't we? How else we'd know? :)

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)06:59 No. 97571 ID: 0a76c8
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Yes! That's right!

When I get back home my boss is still sitting at his desk.

'Brother I got you a present.'
I say.

'What is it Grey? You know I am busy.'
'It's a gift so it's a surprise. Won't you open it?'

He sighs.
'Fine. Hand it over.'

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)07:04 No. 97576 ID: 0a76c8
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He opens the box. He looks pretty surprised.

'Is this a chess set for me?'
'Yes. I made it just for you.'
'But why? That silly candlefeast?'
'No.. I just want to make you happy, brother.'

He sighs.
'You already make me happy just by being around, Grey.'

Oh no, Im going to blush soon i think!

>>97576
Do you love him?
If so, you might as well tell him.
Maybe a hug, if he doesn't mind that sort of mushy stuff?

>>97576
Give him a hug!

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)08:10 No. 97590 ID: 0a76c8
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Uhmmmm okay.
I give him a tight hug.

'I love you, brother.'
'I love you too, Grey. But we can't be in a relationship because I am your superior. Thank you for the chess set.'

I kind of already knew that I guess.
Its just not nice to hear it.

Say that you understand, and leave him.

Funny. Maybe the fact he's your superior doesn' makes him happy.

Yet, changing that would most likely make him unhappy.

At least the present worked :) He's... as happy as he can get, for now, I guess.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)08:40 No. 97597 ID: 0a76c8
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That's true.

'Okay, I understand.'

I go outside.
Should I just give up?
Or should I try some other things to make him happy?

There is only the two of you, right?

I mean, where is the rest of your comrades?

If only you two are left... why still be your subordinate? Doesn' he needs a sister more?

Well, if you wish, talk to him about it. Just.. say it better than me >.>;

>>97597
So what do you two do anyway? You say he is your boss, that implies you two have some kind of more professional relationship that you would prefer.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)09:20 No. 97611 ID: 0a76c8
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The boss talks to people who want other people dead. Then he plans missions for me.
If its a big mission I go together with others. They stopped returning one by one. I think that's why the boss is scared to send me on a mission again.

Let's see what he has to say.

'Brother! I have been thinking.'
'What? So quickly?'
'Since it's just the two of us we dont have to be all professional anymore. So we can be in a relationship.'
'Now listen here. If we start a thing we can't just stop if the others come back. It will all be very difficult.'

Wait... are you male or female? You said he, but the queen chess piece modeled after you has boobs. WHICH IS IT?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)10:06 No. 97620 ID: 0a76c8
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I didn't want to reveal everything about myself right away because you might suggest inappropiate things.
I am a girl with boobs.

>In a relationship

I smell incest.

Anyway, tell him: "But brother, maybe we could both be the bosses. We'd be like a king and a queen~ <3"

>>97620
oh uhm, thank you, that's erh very nice, I mean very nice to know.

Anyhow, how many of you assassins were there once? Were you all foxfolk?

Also are you two are actually relatives of a sort or is 'brother' and 'sister' merely a customary form of address among your group? (just asking because you wouldn't be the first case of odd relations we've come across so.. while we are clarifying things here.)

Anyhow, perhaps you should get some warm soup for you two or something, it must be cold living in a cave in the winter, even with fur.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)10:20 No. 97624 ID: 0a76c8
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He's not really my brother. We just grew up together so he feels like a big brother to me. I would like him to be more than that. Also it might make him more happy?

'Brother what if we both be the boss like a king and queen?'

He looks at the king and queen chess pieces.

'I dont think you can take that responsibility.'
'Yes I can!'
'Well you have to prove it. Go to town to recruit skilled people to replace our missing members.'

>>97624
Tell him that might not be such a good idea, more people attract attention, and what kinds of skills are he even looking for?

>>97624
How big is the nearest town? I mean it didn't exactly look the bustling metropolis so I doubt you will find many local farmers and craftsmen willing to become assassins there.

Also, is why is there enough political instability in the locale to be able to even support such a 'delicate' and situational business venture? It sounds like someone was getting wise to your ways and culling your numbers fairly effectively.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)10:39 No. 97627 ID: 0a76c8
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I work at far away places too. This is just where we live.
The town is not very big. It is filled with stout people though. Normal people dont live in these places.

'Wont it attract too much attention?'
'Well we cant just sit here. We got a business to run.'
'What kind of skills are we looking for?'
'Any can be used.'
'Okay.'

Into town I suppose...

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)10:53 No. 97630 ID: 0a76c8
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I'm back in town.
Where should I look for extraordinairy talents?

See if you can find a map of the town.

Use your keen sense of smell to find an exemplary cook, if one exists here.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)11:16 No. 97633 ID: 0a76c8
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Here is a map of the town. I marked the most probable places to find strong people.

We dont need a cook to fight!

>>97630
The red light district. Alternatively a bar, there's probably all sorts of talented people there.

>>97633
He never said anything about fighting, he just said skills~

Maybe you can get someone to teach him how to cook, loosen him up some more.

One thing is right.

We found a way to make him happy!
Imean, if he was all worried because of work and stuff, and because your other brothers / subordinates / comrades weren't coming back, hiring new people might cheer him up :)

Or at least get him to stop worrying about work so much.

What would really cheer him was finding out what happened to the others, but if he's not sending you to discover it, he surely has a reason.

>>97633

An army marches on its stomach, babe.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)12:11 No. 97660 ID: 0a76c8
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Dont call me babe! Thats why I didnt say I was a girl.
But okay I am going to find a cook at the tavern.

Inside is a grumpy dwarf. It smells like strong drinks.

'Hello, I am looking for a cook to hire.'
I say.
The dwarf looks up.
'Good thing you showed up, lad. I am looking to fire my incompetent chef-assistent. You can take him off my hands for a tencoin.'

>>97660
Don't forget that chefs make some of the best assassins, poison, spices, deadly sharp metal implements, and best of all... everyone needs to eat.

(okay maybe not wizards but still, 'most' people are going to need a chef once in a while.)

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)12:44 No. 97665 ID: 0a76c8
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'Okay I'll take it.'

I give the barkeep a tencoin.
He yells up the stairs.

'Buster! Get your ass downstairs! Your new employer came to pick you up!'

A scrawny looking dog comes down the stairs. He nods at me.

'Hullo.'

Ask if he has any food specialties.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)13:03 No. 97669 ID: 0a76c8
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We walk back home.

'Do you have any food specialties?'
I ask him.

'I know how to boil potatos.'
'That is pretty nice.'

Oh boy, I leave for a second...

Eh well. I still think Boss wanted something more fighty than a cook.

>>97670
He never said anything like that. And food is very important!

Now go to the bar.

>>97671
Yes. He said we need to replace our comrades who were sent to missions.

Hey, Grey! What kind of stuff your pals did? Can we have names?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)13:11 No. 97674 ID: 0a76c8
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We just left the bar. We're going back home now.

I introduce Buster to my boss.
'Brother, I found us a cook. His name is Buster. He can boil potatoes.'
'Hullo.'
'Oh, I like potatoes. But I dont know how to pay him if we have no fighters.'

The dog sniffs the air.
'Thats okay. I just want to live somewhere. I'll do anything.'

'Okay, you can stay here.'

Hurray! My boss looks a little chippier!

>>97673
... I STILL say he did not mean cooks.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)13:26 No. 97676 ID: 0a76c8
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He says he'll do anything so he can also fight next to cooking. Or anything else we want him to do.

Nevermind him, dont dodge my questions.
Who were your old pals? What kinda stuff they did, what were their talents? If we be replacing them, we need to know what they did, lah?

Tell brother that you're going back to see if anyone else is suitable for joining, time to take initiative.

Visit the Caravan company.

Why does your brother like the mercenary business so much? What would make him want to give it up and settle down for a more normal life?

You don't even need to leave the cave. You could start farming out of it. Maybe buy some cave crops, that sort of thing.

>>97676

Is your cave in disrepair? Without minions it may have lapsed somewhat. If so, send newly acquired minion to clean the place up.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)14:39 No. 97699 ID: 0a76c8
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I show Buster around a little. I'll make cleaning his first duty.

We enter the bedroom. He takes off his scarf.
I tell him he gets to sleep on the top bunk.
'Okay'
he says.

My old brothers and sisters were all strong like me. We killed a lot of people.
We don't really know what else to do.
I also find it satisfying to kill or hurt someone. It makes me feel a little at peace.
Maybe I will hurt Buster a bit later.

>>97699
That might not be a good idea. If he feels that it's dangerous to stay, he will run off. Maybe after he's been here a while; let him feel secure before you do anything and don't hurt him too badly. The key is to make sure he thinks staying here is worth the abuse.

There are other ways to get some peace, have you tried meditation?

See if you can get him to start some food, sharing a nice meal is really nice~

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)14:49 No. 97708 ID: 0a76c8
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Being a leader is very hard. I don't know if I can be the queen if I cant abuse people.
Isn't there some fast way to ensure that he stays here?

>>97699
So you enjoy causing pain? hmmm, lets just say that most of the people we 'advise' arn't quite so... sadistic.

Anyhow, I would have to say that most people you meet arn't going to be into the painplay so you may want to avoid introducing most of your newer hires to such "tendencies".

Most normal people are just going to turn tail and run if they think it is not worth the trouble. The Chain of Command isn't always the one you beat them with if you understand.

So what were your siblings like?

>>97708
...You're a strange one, Grey.
But yes, tell us about your comrades so we know what kinds of people to recruit.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)15:07 No. 97715 ID: 0a76c8
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I dont like not getting to beat my juniors. So how can I make them stay forever right away? There has to be a shortcut.

My siblings were okay.
I was the youngest so they ignored me usually. It's pretty empty without them I think.

>>97715
A... shortcut?

Um, there is one thing you could give him to get him to want to stay. But you wanted us not to suggest that kind of thing, right? Also, you could get the hurting done at the same time. Some people like that. You could even get him a little collar and lead him around on a leash...

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)15:14 No. 97717 ID: 0a76c8
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Putting him on a leash sounds hilarous. Is it like slavery? Maybe having one slave is okay. He might still try to escape.
Or do you mean something else?

>>97717
SEX. THERE I SAID IT.

>>97717
I meant treating him like a love slave, including hurting him during the act. Erotically.

Um, would Yellow object to something like that? Would he want you to only share your body with him?

>>97717
It's called bondage. You would have to have sex with him though, so you might not want to do that if you're saving yourself for brother.

Honestly the easiest way to make him stay is just be nice to him, if you get him to like you he'll do pretty much whatever you say.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)15:24 No. 97724 ID: 0a76c8
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Well I dont know about bondage and stuff like that. Just sex can work.
I'll ask him.

'Buster, will you let me beat you if we have sex periodically?'
'...Yes.'

Yay! I can apply this to the others I recruit too maybe?

>>97724
If you recruit more than like 10, you'll need a lot of spare time.

Well it depends, are you bisexal? They're probably not ALL going to be men after all.

Even so, some of them probably have different standards, so it might not work with all of them.

>>97724
What.
That was uh... blunt.
Er, no I don't think you oughta go sleeping with all the new recruits.
Just one little bitch-boy oughta be enough to satisfy your... eh, violent tendencies, right?

>>97724
Well, you probably won't need to apply it to everyone anyway. One or two of them might actually like being beaten, too.

So let's try finding a fighter now. To the town guard's barracks I guess.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)15:36 No. 97736 ID: 0a76c8
File 126169777544.gif - (8.22KB , 640x480 , 43.gif )

Yeah...unf... Maybe..ah..just beating Buster is...unh...enough. I...unf... can leave the others alone...ah... I'll go back to town...oof...in a moment.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)15:38 No. 97739 ID: 0a76c8
File 126169790219.gif - (13.04KB , 640x480 , 44.gif )

When we're done I tell Buster to clean.
I had to the town.
I arrive when the sun is starting to go down.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)15:47 No. 97746 ID: 0a76c8
File 12616984567.gif - (8.30KB , 640x480 , 45.gif )

I head into the townwatch barracks.
There is a man at the desk there. He glares at me for no reason.

'Hello, I am looking for strong warriors to recruit.'
'So are we. All strong men are subject to the rule of conscript. So go recruit in another town.'

Uh oh!

Well, can still recruit strong women.

Maybe try the Caravan?

Well "strong" does not equal "skilled", an untrained burly person is often miles below a thin, trained person for fighting.

uhmmm, I suppose that was a bad time for this voice to take a snack. I wouldn't have suggesting you bone your underlings so you could hurt them.

I thought you wanted our boss anyway?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)15:55 No. 97752 ID: 0a76c8
File 126169894831.gif - (8.73KB , 640x480 , 46.gif )

Strong women? That's a great idea!

'Do you know where I can find strong women then?'
'What? You want women in your fighting force? That just means bad luck. But it's your funeral. Go to the caravan company, ask for Surla. She came here as a caravan guard. Now she cant get a job as one anymore.'

Okay I was heading there anyway!

>>97752
Women make better assassins anyhow. People you want dead are usually men, men fear men, men don't fear women.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)16:07 No. 97762 ID: 0a76c8
File 126169967629.gif - (9.63KB , 640x480 , 47.gif )

That is pretty smart.

I go into the Caravan Company. There is a man at a desk counting money.
He nods at me when I enter.

'Hello. I want to recruit strong warriors.'
I say.

'Just wait at the tavern until the next caravan comes in. Join that. Hiring guards all by yourself is not economical.'
'No, I mean I want to recruit them for my own purposes.'
'Then youre out of luck. All warriors living here are conscripted by the townwatch.'
'What about women?'
'Female warriors? Here? No way.'
'What about Surla?'
'What? Oh, her. Wait around here for a moment. She'll come in to try getting a job soon. I dunno why youd want a woman in your army, though. Its bad luck.'

While you're waiting, ask about her. Or at least what she looks like so you'll know when she arrives.

>>97762
I don't believe in luck, fate however...

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)16:17 No. 97770 ID: 0a76c8
File 126170022960.gif - (9.83KB , 640x480 , 48.gif )

'Okay, I will wait. Can you tell me about her? What does she look like?'
'Several days ago she came in with a caravan. The merchants from here didn't want a woman on the guard so she was layed off. She's been trying to convince us to hire her anyway several times a day. She looks like muscled man with tits and long hair, red.'

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)16:26 No. 97775 ID: 0a76c8
File 126170076497.gif - (11.83KB , 640x480 , 49.gif )

Surla arrives after a little bit.
The man counting money says
'Surla! This person wants to hire you. It ain't for a caravan.'
'That's okay! As long as I can get out of this stinkhole.'

I nod at her.
'Let's go to my house right away.'

Ask her about rates on the way.

Tell us more about your dead siblings, and what kind of mercenary work you guys did.

Ask her what she can do besides fighting, multitalents are good.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)16:34 No. 97780 ID: 0a76c8
File 126170124829.gif - (11.47KB , 640x480 , 50.gif )

'How much do you want to get paid?'
I ask her.
'I dont know. I usually let the caravan masters figure that out. Maybe 3 gold per hour?'
she answers. I nod.

My brothers and sisters and I killed people. Sometimes many, sometimes a few. Also we just destroyed things sometimes.

We get back to my home.
'Brother! I found a strong warrior!'
'Hello there, I am Surla.'

He jumps up with excitement.
'Grey, you did it! Now we can be King and Queen together.'

Hug him so much!

Hug him but not enough to make your new hire awkward.

Explain that she wants three gold per hour. Is that a lot?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)16:44 No. 97783 ID: 0a76c8
File 126170184964.gif - (11.73KB , 640x480 , 51.gif )

Hurray! I hug him very tightly!
While we hug the new recruit clears her throat.
I explain to my boss
'She wants 3 gold per hour.'
He looks to her and says
'Here we dont pay per hour, we pay per mission. If you succeed you get atleast 100 gold for the easiest missions.'
'Okay that sounds good!'
Surla sounds pretty happy.
And my boss too!
Yes, I did it!

>>97783

Tell me queen, does your little group/businesses venture/empire have a name?

Perhaps one orthodonticly inspired?

Ask him what else is necessary to continue doing business.

Ask if he'd like to take some time off if he can spare it. Maybe go to the candlefeast. You don't have to worship anything. Just eat and have fun.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)16:59 No. 97789 ID: 0a76c8
File 126170276610.gif - (11.37KB , 640x480 , 52.gif )

Maybe now we're king and queen we should make up a new name for the group! What would be good?

'Surla, you can meet our third member in the bedroom. If you want to beat him just have sex with him. He's pretty good I think.'
'Uh okay. I'll say hi.'

Surla goes into the bedroom.
Me and my boss twirl to the desk.

'What should we do now to continue business?'

He lifts me onto the desk.
'Well we should finish our standing missions.'
'Can we take a vacation before tha.. UNF!'
'Yes...unf!...we can...unf!...'
'Let's go...unf!...to the candlefeast...unf!'
'...unf!...okay!...unf!...'

Don't break the chess set!

Pause Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/24(Thu)17:05 No. 97794 ID: 0a76c8
File 126170311236.gif - (11.78KB , 640x480 , pausescreen2.gif )

We'll be careful!

Well, this quest went from zero to sex in about 8.7 seconds.

>>97824
Technically, it was 41 posts and 36 hours.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)03:39 No. 97929 ID: 0a76c8
File 126174116216.gif - (13.12KB , 640x480 , 53.gif )

Me and my King head into town. We hold hands.
The Candlefeast will begin when it's completely dark outside.

>>97620
??? It said in the first part that Grey is a boy.

She said that to throw us off, so we wouldn' suggest innapropriate things.

Dine together in a fine resturant.

>>97976
Then relax at a Inn ^_^

>>97986
Better yet, some hot springs.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)13:41 No. 98040 ID: 392d01
File 126177730827.gif - (8.29KB , 640x480 , 54.gif )

We head for a nice restaurant to eat. There is only one expensive restaurant in this town. It is where the rich merchants and caravan leaders and townwatch officers eat.

We eat delicious meatloaf.

'Dont you miss the others?'
he asks me.
I kind of shake my head.
'I dont really know them because Im the youngest. Youre the only one who payed attention to me.'
'Yeah Ive been wanting to fuck you since you were little.'
I blush real bad.
He is so cool.

>>98040
Did you two run away from the others?

>>98041
They just stopped coming back she said, in their line of work "retirement" is like that. One day you just stop coming back, it's probably best not to think about about why.

>>98040
>fuck you since you were little

wat!

Tell him so long as he's here, you don't need anyone else~

Except maybe Buster so you can smack him around a bit.

>>98043
He was younger too then remember, older than her but still.

>>98040
So BLUNT!
What is with you two?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)15:32 No. 98059 ID: 392d01
File 12617839233.gif - (8.40KB , 640x480 , 55.gif )

I dont like speaking in riddles. It confuses me. He must know that so he speaks like me I think.
Isn't that sweet?

'As long as youre here I dont need anyone else except maybe Buster because I can slap him around.'
'Baby you are sweet and sexily cruel.'

We hold hands.

The food is really good.

>>98059
Ask him "Do you like getting slapped around?"

Because we can arrange that.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)15:36 No. 98061 ID: 392d01
File 126178418898.gif - (8.36KB , 640x480 , 56.gif )

Okay well
'Do you like to be slapped around too? Because I can do that.'
'No if you hit me I will kill you.'
'Really?'
'No okay I wont kill YOU but Ill get angry so dont do it.'
'Well okay.'

>>98061
"What about a little biteybite? Y'know, when we're screwin'?"

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)15:46 No. 98063 ID: 392d01
File 126178479124.gif - (8.37KB , 640x480 , 57.gif )

'Can I bite you when we fuck?'
'Yes. We can use claws too.'

>>98061
So hey what ARE his fetishes then? You should find out!

>>98064
You two are going to have sooooo many babies.

Five hundred babies.

The baby is the gift.

>>98064
Oh my god. In the restaurant? What if people see? The owner might get upset!

>>98064
uhm, well then, I guess this is a quite erh passionate relationship.

>>98064
Goodness!
Right in the middle of the restaurant?
I think the other patrons might take offense.
Honestly you gnolls are so tactless...

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)16:05 No. 98073 ID: 392d01
File 126178594620.gif - (10.39KB , 640x480 , 59.gif )

Me and my boss can get out of any trouble. We're very strong.
'What.. unf!.. are...unf!... your fetishes... unf!... brother?'
I ask.

'I dont... unf... have any... unf...I just like...unf...to fuck you...unf...'

But then the restaurants owner runs in.
He yells at us.
'Hey you too! Pay me now and get out or I will get the townwatch!!!'

>>98073
"...find us a closet in the back and we'll let you watch."

>>98073
Maybe it would be better to take your passion to a slightly more 'secluded' place.

Pay, leave.

Seriously.
No need for trouble.

And next time, DONT do it in the middle of the restaurant! >.<;

Its awesome but impractical.

>>98073
I told you!
Oh well, no need to make a scene.. or, well, MORE of a scene.
Pay the woman and take the, er... festivities to a more private location.

>>98073
Don't take any shit from them. Fight while having sex, too.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)16:15 No. 98079 ID: 392d01
File 126178654359.gif - (15.67KB , 640x480 , 60.gif )

Okay Im sorry. This was a little weird, wasnt it?
We wont do it again.

We pay the restaurant owner.

Outside it is dark. There are many people out and about. Lots of candles are everywhere.
It is so romantic.

>>98079
It's very pretty, maybe find a nice quiet place where you can watch the lights, and finish that earlier business, maybe there is a nice dry place under those pines?

>>98079
Ehf. Better this way.

Well, actually.
The problem isn' the act itself. You can do as rabbits wherever you please, for all I care.
But if it becomes a problem, avoid it. There's no sense in making a huge scene in the town, ne?

Hmmmn...

What about a seedy alley?
Start doing it, attract some lowlife's attention. Kill lowlife.

Sex and bloodshed :D

>>98080
Why stunt creativity? Climb up into the pines! Better view and it's more interesting that way~

>>98083
A good point, but are they good climbers?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)16:31 No. 98085 ID: 392d01
File 126178748739.gif - (17.68KB , 640x480 , 61.gif )

I take my king to the back of an alley below some pinetrees to continue.
We have sex for a long time. The candlefeast goes on through the night.

I am very happy! My king is happy too!

Now that we are king and queen I just want to give him one more gift to seal the deal.
What should it be?

Whatever you think of, or the other voices suggest, you shall not be tricked into giving him 'the gift of death'

You wont kill him or yourself as the gift in some stupid proof of devotion.

NEVER.

Now, what kind of gift can top a chessboard and a sex life?

>>98085
You could get him something he could wear to remind him of you. A piece of armor, or jewelry.

>>98087
Maybe some kind of symbol that will be the banner of your beloved King?

>>98045

He said "you" not "we" so I am assuming he's using distancing language.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)16:43 No. 98093 ID: 392d01
File 126178822987.gif - (18.03KB , 640x480 , 62.gif )

A symbol that he can remember me by.....What about a vial of our mixed love juices?

>>98093

No, that's disgusting.

As long as you don't think he'd find it weird, go for it!

O_O I wouldn't want it. A lock of hair maybe.

>>98093
That would go bad soon, what about a tooth, do your fangs grow back?

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)16:52 No. 98103 ID: 392d01
File 126178875865.gif - (17.79KB , 640x480 , 63.gif )

Well he just came inside me so it will be easy to do.
I kick him off.
Time to get a vial quickly.

>>98100
Love jiuces go bad, as this guy points out, though teeth might not make the best gift. How about some sort of icon? A woodcarving or a painting? Maybe some sort of locket?

>>98103
Fucking Christ girl. You crazy.

Don't do it IN the shop, wait till you get outside.

Okay, someone needs to teach this girl bedside manners.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)16:56 No. 98112 ID: 392d01
File 126178898194.gif - (10.25KB , 640x480 , 64.gif )

I dont want to give him some jewelry. I wouldnt have made it myself. No significance.
Taking a tooth out would hurt so much!

I go to the general store.
'Hello, I want a vial on a necklace.'
'I have a beautiful crystal vial. Its 50 gold. It is very beautiful.'

>>98112
Girl, you have some issues. What happened to the "Don't want anything wrong thought of me"?

Get it. Double check that it's watertight.

*ahemchoochooahem*
This is a bad idea. Very bad.

>>98112
Wow! That's a lot. But aren't the most expensive gifts usually the best?

I was about to suggest having his kids as the ultimate gift, but...

DO NOT FILL THE VIAL WHILE THE MERCHANT IS LOOKING FOR GODS SAKE!

>>98119
Kids would probably be a better gift than scraping out his gift to you and bottling it up.

>>98112
Ignore the naysayers, I bet he'll love it!

>>98112
You really are just the oddest thing.
Oh well, make sure you seal it really well~

...And for goodness sake don't fill it right in the middle of the shop. Find some privacy you tactless thing.

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)17:20 No. 98126 ID: 392d01
File 126179042569.gif - (18.27KB , 640x480 , 65.gif )

I pay the shopkeeper 50 gold.
It really is beautiful.
I will fill it in the alley.

'What are you doing?'
my king asks.

'I am making your gift.'
'Oh. For candlefeast?'
'No. For you because I am happy with our current situation. I want to seal the deal.'
'It must be a great gift then!'

I would give him kids but it takes a few months for them to come out I think.

It's pretty? We wanna see!

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)17:29 No. 98132 ID: 392d01
File 126179097479.gif - (7.65KB , 640x480 , 66.gif )

I put it around his neck.
'This is to remember me by. Now we must be together forever. You cant ever leave or something, okay?'
I say.
My king nods. He also blushes!
'Yes, I agree.'
He looks proud.

I am very happy. Now we will be together forever!
I win!

>>98126
>>/questdis/317907

Kiss him~

>>98132
>I win!
Yes... yes you do.

Oh kiss him~
You practically HAVE to!
It is the most dramatically appropriate action!

>>98132
Oh God, the Yellow King FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF...

Grey!j8gTXHkdsQ 2009/12/25(Fri)17:47 No. 98143 ID: 392d01
File 126179205765.gif - (10.05KB , 640x480 , 67.gif )

I kiss him.
Behind me the townfolk light up the bonfire.
It is like the fire in my heart!

This is the best candlefeast ever!

>>98143
Annnnnd End dream/memory sequence.

Theta][Sigma 2009/12/25(Fri)17:48 No. 98145 ID: f21281
File 126179213376.jpg - (17.90KB , 355x393 , The_Doctor_69.jpg )

>>98140

>Yellow
>Gray
>Gnolls
>YELLOW FANG AND GRAY FANG

Hug and check out that bonfire.

>>98145
You just got it didn't you.

The End GiftQuest 2009/12/25(Fri)17:51 No. 98149 ID: 392d01
File 126179229496.gif - (18.22KB , 640x480 , 68.gif )

The End

People killed: 0/135
People recruited: 2/2
People fucked: 2/1
Gold spend: 92.1/300

Your rank is:
Innocent Lech

Congratulations!
and
MERRY CHRISTMAS!

>>98145
Huh.
Well.
DUH?

>>98149
And a merry Candlemass to you too Grey and Yellow, I wish you a brighter future than your past.

Meeeeerry christmaaas~

Suggestion 2009/12/25(Fri)18:14 No. 98160 ID: 434704
File 126179366716.jpg - (51.49KB , 275x300 , 1197834048428.jpg )

>>98145
BY JOVE!!!

>>98154
hahaha

They're gonna get slaughtered. One will have a superheavy crossbow bolt lodged in their brain, the other will get killed by Ridder. Hopefully their two employees won't feel loyal enough to fight back.

>>98161
I think Reaver needed more people to throw at Ridder to make things interesting.
And this was a very awesome way to do it.

Suggestion 2009/12/25(Fri)22:11 No. 98340 ID: 44a26f
File 126180787961.jpg - (81.18KB , 800x529 , cleese.jpg )

>>98145

!

>>98145
There is no yellow fang. It's actually Grey Fang and Orange Fang.

>>98444
No, Orange left the mercenaries, and Grey would've been mentioned as leaving as well if she left with him.. It's definitely Yellow Fang.